Something Rich and Strange

Sunday, 1320 Hours, Washington, D.C. After sequestering myself overnight and this morning away from windows for safety, I finally summoned enough courage to peer between the blinds and discovered that that almost perfectly spherical orb that consists of hot plasma interwoven with magnetic fields - the sun - was now dominating the weather again. Damn. Will this heat never end? Your intrepid hurricane reporter is now signing-off until the next threat.


Saturday, 2145 Hours,Washington, D.C.  Well, due to the lack of light, it's difficult to report anything really substantive. Additionally, there's really nothing substantive to report, irrespective of the hour. A quick look out the front of my building (flouting all recommendations to stay away from windows) indicates a light rain falling. Also, and it may just be limited to the area of D.C. that I live in (or at least, the area directly in front of me), there is no wind. In fact, the only wind related to Hurricane Irene in the D.C. area seems to be coming from weather commentators. But I'm sure once the sun rises again (assuming it does), I'll have more to report. In the meantime, in case you missed it, you may want want to read an earlier blog on weather. Stay tuned.


Saturday, 1648 Hours, Washington, D.C. Now things are really starting to happen; I heard thunder. Who could have imagined an afternoon thunder storm in late August in D.C.?  I think I'll try to get to Safeway for last minute provisioning. The bread and milk will have been long gone, but I might be able to muster up some granola bars past the expiration date. Actually, the low-on-stock situation at Safeway would be typical for any Saturday night. Washingtonians name their Safeways and the one I'm referring to is the Soviet Safeway (always low on stock and always long lines; get it?). At least it's better than Capitol Hills' UnSafeway. Wish me luck.


Saturday, 1500 Hours, Washington, D.C. What's the difference between Hurricane Irene and a typical late summer rain storm? So far, positioning. From a marketing, not a global satellite perspective, that is. Yes, it's a bit windy and has been raining steadily for the past hour. But the flooding - oops, I mean storm surge - of streets and gutters we're currently experiencing is more the result of a municipal infrastructure less efficient than an incandescent light bulb. And I'm being a little hard on incandescent light bulbs, here. 


Saturday, 1200 Hours, Washington, D.C. (OK, I know this post automatically has the time and date. But this dateline gives it a more Irwin Allen-esque feel). Still reeling from a massive earthquake earlier in the week that caused irreparable damage to three figurines in a local woman's Hummel collection, our nation’s capital is now bracing for the onslaught of Hurricane Irene. Already the ground looks damp and I think I saw a branch move, but it could have been a squirrel. More later.

Anyone who has a blog, though its readership may measure well into the lower single digits, understands that to begin blogging again after a long absence begs an explanation. So here’s mine: in the months that I have been silent, nothing of international, nay, universal import, has compelled me to write. I have this work gig, tennis gig, voice gig, painting gig, etc. that have consumed most of my discretionary time recently. And until now, I haven’t had a reason with enough importance to weigh-in on any debate of national or international significance. In fact, I’ve probably dawdled a bit in getting to this particular post. But here it is – George Clooney needs to date someone whose IQ surpasses her TVQ. Yes, this is a bloggervention.

If you’ve been exposed to a television (particularly in a public location), stood in a supermarket checkout line or have been forced to read publications of the “People” or “US Weekly” ilk while waiting for a professional service, you know that Clooney and his potential life partner, some obscure (although less so, thanks to Clooney) Italian model, have parted ways. Needless to say in these situations, there is no shortage of speculation about who will be next to occupy a place in his heart and his Lake Como villa. Mostly this list is populated by women who have devoted their life’s work to activities that involve standing in front of a camera. Many have found time to get their GED.  While I can’t begin to predict who it might be, owing to my complete lack of exposure to popular culture predicative models for celebrity dating, I can say the type of woman I think it should be.

First of all, there are certain assumptions. Well, actually, one: Clooney can pretty much date whomever he wants. That’s pretty cool. But who should he want? That’s where my invaluable advice comes in.

Age. (Appropriate) First and foremost, he should find someone in the general vicinity of his own age, say 10 years. If we’re to believe that wisdom grows with life experience and, as a consequence, aging, a woman who is 45 has more to contribute than someone who is 25.

Education. I’m thinking an academic pedigree similar to Samantha Power’s or Condoleezza Rice’s*, both in terms of the institutions (Harvard, Stanford) and subject matter of international affairs. While Clooney may not have formal training in international relations (the policy, not the interpersonal type, the latter of which he is an unsurpassed content expert), he has devoted a fair amount of his free time promoting and supporting humanitarian efforts internationally.

Accomplishment. Again using Power and Rice (hey, that sounds like a humanitarian relief effort in and of itself) as examples, George should find someone who has actually achieved more with her life than landing a minor role in “Deuce Bigelow, American Gigolo.”

My final plea: George (may I call you George?), you’ve proven you can attract (young) women that score high on the babelicious scale. But I’m speculating you’d find more happiness with a woman whose contributions to society will not be forgotten once the tabloids hit the round file. Just a guess; I could be wrong.

*Yes, I realize that Power is married (but if George hadn’t been dallying with a woman who hosted music videos for the past couple of years, he might have had a chance) and Rice’s politics may be a bit, um, conservative, but these are just examples, people.